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I hear this all the time from people who are disappointed in their Ayahuasca ceremony. Especially first timers. But the truth is that you always receive exactly what you need, even if you misuse this medicine.
Read on to learn how it works and this is why a lot of people misunderstand this sacred plant.
Unrealistic expectations
Say you suffer from depression for over two decades. You ‘ve been on different antidepressants for over ten years. Maybe you even thought about giving up your will to live.
But you expect that after a week-long retreat and an Ayahuasca ceremony you will be happy, healed and free. I understand. I had the same wishful thinking. It’s easy to believe that Ayahuasca is the magic pill, the elixir that will solve all your problems and in a way She is. But not the way at all how you expect it. Let me explain.
Sickness doesn’t happen overnight either. Disease develops overtime and the deeper roots of it may be present far back in your past. By the time it manifests as a physical symptoms a long time has passed. A lot of decisions, loss, heartache, disappointments, regrets and resentments.
Your past weighs you down. Like rocks that you carry, it’s painful but you are used to it, you think it’s part of who you are, you never even consider to put them down. Just try to carry on. Until you can’t.
Healing is a process of purification
Healing is a process of purification, of letting go those weights you carry. Those suppressed emotions, those limiting beliefs, those destructive habits and toxicity that is the fertile ground for disease.
Ayahuasca is the vine of the dead. She will take you through this alchemical process of healing and purification. She will guide you through your death and rebirth process.
First you need to let go..
But first comes death. She will push those rocks you carry onto the surface so you can let them go. This means facing your own shadows. Seeing clearly how you choose to be a victim, how you self sacrifice, how you grasp onto your story, onto your pain, refusing to let go. How you are addicted to toxicity, comfort and to those who destroy your soul.
Are you willing to see yourself like that? Are you willing to see all who you are?
Once you are deep into the shadow of you valley you will be forced to open your eyes. And you will cry. Buckets of tears. And you will scream and shout until there is nothing left inside.
Then meet the authentic You
And then you will be planted in the earth as a seed. Empty but full. Full of a new potential. A new possibility. A more authentic you. Someone who is beyond the story. The real you, magical, strong and free.
Do you think you can do this in a week?
Everything is possible I think but it is very unlikely. My experience is that this journey will take around a year to eighteen months if you fully dedicate yourself to it and if you have personal support and guidance. It is a big undertaking.
Is it worth it? It is, if you want to be free.
Change and healing takes time
So when you tell me that Ayahuasca did nothing for you because a few weeks after your retreat you still feel like shit or maybe even worse…well that is like going to the cinema to watch a movie then walking out after the first 10 minutes and then complaining that the movie was crap and it didn’t make any sense. You understand?
Healing is a process and you cannot bypass the necessary inner work that is needed to be free. Consider this before you go to another plant medicine ceremony.
With love, Nina Izel
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